13 Sep No, You Can’t Forgive Yourself

Ten years ago, I sat in the office of a pastor whom I barely knew and shared with him things I had done wrong that had left my life in crisis mode. I had been forgiven by others for these things, but I could not forgive myself. That pastor told me that my pride shouldn’t stop me from acknowledging that I can do things for which I need to be forgiven. I would later learn my problem was much deeper than that: thinking that I can forgive myself at all.

You see, if we have truly accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, we understand that God and God alone can forgive us for the wrongs we have done. Guilt, shame and regret should not come naturally to those of us who walk with Christ, if we have truly received the forgiveness He paid for on the cross:

⁷ But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. ⁸ If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. ⁹ If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:7-9 (NIV)

Nate Graybill puts it this way:

If you think about it, no one in society has the authority to forgive themselves for something that they have done wrong. Teenagers can’t “un-ground” themselves. Prisoners can’t declare themselves forgiven and walk out of prison. People in a debt crisis can’t forgive themselves the remainder of what they owe. In all instances, we need a higher authority to pardon us or to declare that the debt from the sin is “paid in full.” Come to think of it, if we could forgive ourselves, we wouldn’t need Jesus. 

In fact, saying He could forgive sins was perhaps the biggest reason the religious leaders of His day targeted Jesus. They declared “only God can forgive sins!” They were right on that point, of course. Where they went wrong was refusing to accept Jesus as God. On this side of the cross, we have no excuse for doing that.

A few words from Paul’s letter to believers in Rome are also helpful here:

²³ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.  Romans 3:23 (NIV)

²³ For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in  Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 6:23 (NIV)

Paul also said: If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved (Romans 10:9). If you’ve done the former but not the latter, I pray today that you will and then receive the incredible, liberating gift of forgiveness that only God can provide.

Pastor Jerry Bader